Just Wanna Share How Suck My Life at The Moment

This past few months I experienced a series of an unfortunate event. Ya you can say that I hit the rock bottom. Sad? sure... but they said that life must go on..they also said that I'm such an ungrateful bitch. Well... maybe I am (?) Haha I'm like a sponge who absorb everything that given to me. But people, you don't know that I've been struggle with myself since! day! 1! You know what? I also hate myself, maybe more than you. When I recall my memories, there is no single time that I remember I love or proud of myself. I'm tired...I'm tired of being not enough. I hate being not smart enough, kind enough, or pretty enough.

Maybe there is something wrong with me, I just don't know what it is. I truly am want to love myself. Mai? what the hell is wrong with you? I hate you Mai, why why whyyyyy you did this to urself. You know what? I even feel sad when I graduated S1. I'm such a failure.......... I just need one thing, one thing to make me feel that I'm precious, but I'm just lost, I don't know what to do.

Fadhil Priana, if you read this...I just wanna say thank you for everything. You're a bliss in my life. The one that always been there for me, the one that never gave up on me even though I'm giving up on you. I'm sorry....sorry for being Mai and sorry for being pathetic and can't make everything work.